Sometimes I worry that I do not think enough, so today, I sat in a chair in the backyard for some time, and I just thought. I tried very hard to think deeply and well. I worked on this for a very long time, and when I was done, I reviewed what I had managed to think about. I had managed to have two thoughts:

1. Julie Andrews played a nannie in two different movies. This has never actually occurred to me before. And even though they were both classics and everyone loves them, she must have been kind of pissed about it. Did she ever think, “Listen, not all British women with bobs are nannies! I could play a thousand roles.” I’m sure she eventually got to do other things, too, but nobody remembers those. Also, both nannies were singing nannies, which, it’s frankly quite amazing that they even made two movies about singing nannies, before you even consider the fact that the same woman played both of them; and

2. It really makes no sense at all that A.C. Slater and Jessie Spano ever dated.

So I am not good at thinking, and people talk a lot now about how the internet has ruined our ability to think deeply and well. But when I was a kid, everyone was saying that about television. And they were right, so it really doesn’t matter what the internet does to us because we were already gone.

10 Comments

  1. Please elaborate on number 2.

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    1. Well, they just had nothing in common, did they? Jessie was a brainy feminist and Slater was just sort of a jock. I could buy them having a sort of angry fuck-buddy type relationship, but they dated for, like, years. And there was no chemistry between either the actors or the characters. I don’t believe it, not for a minute.

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      1. I guess I had my eye more on Kelly Kapowski anyway. Oh, and, later, that April whose dad owned the resort the gang all worked at. The thing I found refreshing about the show was its commitment to realism. Has there ever been a truer everyman than Screech Powers?

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        1. I guess I had my eye more on Kelly Kapowski anyway.

          Well, didn’t everyone? Poor Lisa.

          Has there ever been a truer everyman than Screech Powers?

          No. And (with the exception of ‘the Rachel’) has there ever been a more influential haircut than the Zack Morris pie cut?

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          1. Poor Lisa.

            Fashion has its price.

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      2. And there was no chemistry between either the actors or the characters.

        Was there any chemistry between any of them? Really?

        I mean, except between Mr. Belding and Screech. Because that’s just obvious.

        Real life: Slater and Kelly are the high school power couple. The rest of the pairings are up for debate and discussion.

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        1. True enough. Although I still maintain that of all the improbable chemistry-less pairings, Jessie and Slater were the least convincing.

          Really, the only reason for SBTB to exist at all is for the very special episode during which Jessie became addicted to caffeine pills.

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          1. I’m so excited.

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  2. Note how this comment thread further illustrates my conclusion.

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