Last night, I had a date, and we were playing pool, and I was wearing a hoodie, and I have very long hair. At one point, I wanted to put my hair up — I do this by bending over at the waist, flipping all my hair over, and gathering it into a hair tie.

This time, when I did that, I accidentally hair-tied the strings of my hoodie, too, but the strings weren’t long enough to reach to the top of my head with my neck fully straightened, so when I stood up, I basically vertically clotheslined myself.

And it was a new, not-yet-stretched-out hair tie, so I couldn’t easily pull the hoodie strings out. They were really tightly bound in there. So I started just basically clawing my hair out into a giant bird’s nest with my neck craned awkwardly down toward my shoulders, and I also started laughing maniacally, because it was so ridiculous.

The guy just looked confused and embarrassed for me, so I don’t think that’s going to work out, because honestly, it gets so much worse than that on a regular basis.



  1. Fantastic writing. The first sentence opens a world of possibilities. The last sentence is classic. And a hilarious story in between. Would love to be following your date on Twitter to hear his version of events!


  2. I don’t want to laugh, but you make it sound so funny!! I’m sorry. Maybe he’ll call (?) He’s probably had a similar experience … I don’t mean while putting his hair up in a hair tie, but doing something that was embarrassing. Maybe in 20 years you’ll laugh about it together … or you’ll tell the guy who you’re meant to be with about this and laugh about how you’re so glad it didn’t work out. Okay, I’m really trying here 🙂


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