Everyone will tell you that babies do not need a lot of stuff. Specifically, they don’t need a lot of toys or books. A baby can entertain itself for a long time with a saucepan, or a cardboard box.

Well, those people are right. Babies don’t need a lot of stuff. BUT I DO! Edith can play with the same three toys for weeks on end, but I fucking can’t, if I have to sit on the floor and waggle an object in front of an infant’s face for hours, I am going to at least need a wide variety of objects of different colors and sizes to waggle. Edith doesn’t know one book from another, but there are only so many times I can show her the same damn black-and-white photos of a cat before I need a new book to patiently point at.

So my advice is different: kids are dull as hell, so buy yourself an infinite variety of toys and books to play with.


  1. Zandy says:

    And then before you know it, they’re the ones making you motion sick while they show you around Minecraft.


    1. Elizabeth says:

      I don’t know what a Minecraft is, and I resent that I will one day have to find out.

      Liked by 1 person

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