This will be Edith’s first Christmas, so I want to celebrate it. But then, I think, does it make any sense to celebrate it? I mean, we will. But I keep thinking:
A tree. All Edith wants to do right now is climb on things and pull on things and chew on things. So we’re going to erect the most glittery, dangly, climbable looking structure imaginable with all sorts of hanging bits and textures to chew, and then….thwart her every time she tries to go anywhere near it.
Presents. Edith has about five thousand toys and books. She plays with exactly two of them (and those she just chews on) and is always far, far more interested in my phone, plastic bags, crumbs on the floor, and climbing into the dishwasher. She will not be interested in any of the gifts we give her, but she will VERY MUCH want to eat the wrapping paper. Which we won’t allow.
Food. Edith doesn’t eat yet. I try to feed her at least twice a day. She ate some hummus one time.
Lights. Edith’s bedtime is 6:30 and I begin to acclimate her to the notion of going to bed at 5:00. She cannot stay up late enough to view any lights.
Baby Jesus. I am an atheist and even if I weren’t, Edith doesn’t understand complex concepts.
So overall, Christmas is primarily going to be an exercise in frustration and denial for Edith. But goddamnit, I have a baby and we’re doing her first Christmas, no matter how much she hates it!