Category: Rants

Wonder Woman and Boogeymen

There was a moment at the beginning of Wonder Woman where I cried. No, it wasn’t the terrible accents. No, it wasn’t the fact that the Amazons had shaved armpits. (Come on, Hollywood.) No, it wasn’t the inexplicable missed opportunity for casting Lucy Lawless as Hippolyta.

My Body Isn’t Beautiful

I haven’t posted a feminist rant here in a really long time, so PULL UP A CHAIR. I’ve been feeling really irritated about the whole self love thing lately, and it took me awhile to articulate why to myself, but I think I’ve finally figured it out.

The Eternal Battle Against Entropy, and My $60 Pillow

For most of my adult life, I lived in very expensive cities on about $30k, which means that I lived in small spaces with several other people, and my furniture was generally of the found or scrounged variety. I was always fairly comfortable in my surroundings (if you discounted the auditory and olfactory senses), but I very rarely spoiled […]

Merry Christmas! And People Disgust Me

I hope everyone had nice holidays. My Christmas was fantastic, but I’d rather skip over that and bitch about the horrible time I had flying home. On the first leg, I was sitting next to a woman in her 50s who had a giant wad of bubble gum in her mouth and who blew big, […]

My friend Chris has been fighting the good fight, writing letters to various corporations to hold them accountable for their sins. Tonight, we joined forces to preach truth to Target, on behalf of rabbit owners everywhere: Dear Target, The name of your company is apt, as we’re certain that many dreams across these United States […]

On Second Thought, I Don’t Like Running. At All.

Since my senior year of high school, I’ve been a runner. This does not mean that I enjoy or take pride in running, or do it well. This means that I shove myself out the door anywhere from once every other month to six times a week and trot miserably around the neighborhood or park […]

No One’s Hiring Elephants Right Now

Say that you’re trying to get work as, I don’t know, an elephant. Because, while it wouldn’t be your dream job or anything – maybe you’d really like to be a tiger – you’ve actually been working as a vole for the past however many years, and elephant would be a big step up for […]