An Amazingly Talented Child

“Oh, hi. Oh, goodness, we’ve not even looked at the menu yet. Well, I know Chanteuse will have…something light. She’s got a shoot today – she’s an actress: stage, tv, film and radio. And she does print-work. Only nine years old. Amazingly talented. Have you seen the movie version of ‘Sleepover Club: Mary’s Exasperating Charge?’ No? Oh. Continue reading “An Amazingly Talented Child”

Aesop’s Fables

Now, then, Ryan. Go to sleep my little man, and I’ll read you…what’s this? Ah yes, Aesop’s Fables. These are good – each with a moral at the end, I remember from when I was a boy. Good advice, all of them, but a bit outdated now, I think. Could probably stand to be revised a bit for today’s world.  Continue reading “Aesop’s Fables”

Diet Tips

Tried all the old favorites, but still obese? Here are some fresh, new tactics to try:

  • Keep a pair of dice in the kitchen. You only get to eat when you roll double sixes.

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Amazing Real-Life Adventure: Purse-Snatching in Brooklyn!

A couple nights ago, my purse was snatched by a tall, skinny kid with short dreads and fashionable jeans. At the time, I was standing on a deserted street corner at 3 a.m., fighting with a broken umbrella. I’d just had a martini the size of my head, and I was wearing headphones. Clearly, I was begging for it, but yet somehow, I was still utterly shocked that it happened. Continue reading “Amazing Real-Life Adventure: Purse-Snatching in Brooklyn!”

Substandard Dystopias

Alex rolled his taped-open eyes. The reeducation teacher had been fooling with the projector for half-an-hour now.

‘Sorry, guys,’ the teacher said now. ‘But I cannot get this freaking thing to work. Oh, well. I guess today we’ll just watch one of the movie downloads on my Mac. You want Grosse Point Blank or Two Towers?’  Continue reading “Substandard Dystopias”

Lost Spoilers

  • Claire moves into the others’ suburban community so that she can finally obtain and enforce a restraining order against Charlie.


  • Desmond hits on Claire. When she rebuffs him, he reminds her that he can see the future, and thus her eventual submission is a foregone conclusion. She figures, what the hell. Their super hot accents make them a hit at the others’ cocktail parties.

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